The Voice of the Teacher and Student

Perhaps you can recall teachers who have made a significant impact on your life, someone who reminded you or taught you something of significance. It might have been new information, such as from a scholastic experience; it might have been a mature relative, such as a grandmother or grandfather; it could also be that of a spiritual teacher, minister or counselor. We assign the "label" of teacher to people like this but we rarely consider the fact that we are each a teacher and a student as we journey through our life experiences.

For those of us who chose to be parents, we want to believe that we are the teachers when in fact, many times, we are the student if we are paying attention. Children offer immediate feedback to us because they truly are the mirrors that tell us a lot about ourselves. Then there are the teachers that are like finger nails on a chalk board. And of course, there are the "teachers" who drive with us on our roads, or stand in the long holiday lines at stores or block our path down an isle because they might be distracted looking for that special gift for someone they love. We are also blessed to have friends and family as teachers and I will allow for all of us to consider the deepest meaning of that idea!!!

I always wanted to believe that teaching involved positive, uplifting kinds of things: new information, insights, skills, directions, etc. What I have found is that teaching and learning is more about edgy kinds of things because being a student requires a willingness to learn new things, to be self reflective without being overly critical of ourselves. The truth is, few of us want to change. Teaching also requires that we offer what we know with loving kindness and assume that when the student is ready what we have shared might one day be absorbed...which turns the teacher into a student. We teach by example more than by word. We learn from example more than from lecture. What I have learned is that when the discomfort scrapes hard enough at my soul, I become the humble student. During this holiday season, let us all be humble willing students and wise patient teachers. We have so much to gain from letting these two roles shake hands and partner us into a better life.

The Voice of Paranoia

I just finished reading an email about all the things this particular person CANNOT do anymore because of all the warning emails that have come into her basket over the years. It is quite comical but it is also extremely sad. The internet is an amazing tool that when used with responsible intention is powerful and good. Unfortunately, the ABUSE ...(Another Blaming Unkind Selfish Excuse to spread ones own prejudice or fear) has hurt many people today, even causing suicide among our youth. Perhaps this message can also be about freedom. With freedom comes great responsibility. Just because I CAN does not mean it is right, kind, or helpful. The beauty and freedom of the internet is also the beast and it is up to us to know which one we want to feed.

Don't get me wrong, fear is a very helpful warning signal that we have developed through years of human evolution. If we listen to it carefully it can guide us into safety and even keep us from playing odds that are not in our favor. It also keeps others safe until doing the right thing is automatic.We have to pay attention to our fear. When we take command of it, it can be our friend. If it takes hold of us, life becomes limited and fear keeps us separated (ie, I am afraid to trust others or myself) or in the extreme (I won't leave my house, aka agoraphobia) or the worst kind of fear (he/she does not think, act, pray, sound, or look like me). Fearing the future is really what fear is based upon and it feeds the perception of being alone and helpless. When President Roosevelt said, "There is nothing to fear but fear itself" it may have been the most important words of the 20th century. We need to be mindful of his advice in the 21st.

We have a lot of things to be concerned about in our world today. I am a baby boomer so I have to say that there has always been a lot to be afraid of in the world. It's not that the world has changed so much as our ability to get information has changed. Our life experiences teach us to be cautious. But in fairness to the life we are meant to live, it makes sense not to feed that mouse of fear until it mutates into a T-Rex. "Let not your hearts be troubled, nor let them be afraid" is a promise and a wonderful prayer to make as we begin our day. Beware of messages that feed your fear and keep you separated from the love you might receive, the life you might live. Maybe putting all those emails into the junk file just might be the order of the day!!!

The Voice of Have To

The holidays are upon us and our "have to" list is going to grow exponentially. In addition to the normal "have to" demands of my life, I also have to add planning a dinner for a group, shopping for gifts, social events, and the crowds that come with all the wonders of the holidays. I have this "have to" voice that is constant. Like an administrative assistant, she is always reminding me that I need to take care of something. If it isn't her voice, it is the voice of my washer, dishwasher, email notices, car, all dinging at me to remind me that they need attention. Have I exhausted you yet?

One day I was reminded that all the things I label as "have to" are "get to." We have dear neighbors who travel to areas of strife and help the citizens in those communities rebuild their lives after disasters. Currently, Haiti is the focus. I also spent one night this week packing Christmas boxes for children in third world countries who may have never before, nor ever again, (as a child) receive a present. Then I came home to our home and looked at all the pictures of my beautiful children and grandchildren, my husband waiting for me with a fire burning, my beginning stack of gifts purchased for Christmas, the warmth of our surroundings, and the food in our refrigerator and I was reminded that I get to take care of all these things.

I am hopeful that these little reminders this week will be continually present in my conscious mind as I go forward in my life. I get to clean our home for the family members that will be celebrating the holiday with us; I get to shop because I have the resources to do so, I get to pay my bills for the same reason. I get to walk our dogs because we have these incredible beings in our life who love us unconditionally. I get to sit here, in the comfort of my kitchen, and write these messages to others, hoping they will inspire at least someone to stop long enough to count their blessings. That is, after all, what Thanksgiving is for.