Wednesday, July 13, 2011

The Voice of Willing

I am finding that life is an unending series of questions, posed to challenge inquiry into how I live. Sometimes little questions crop up daily (should I eat that extra serving); sometimes questions come to me in little snippets (should I go play today or work; how about  a nap after a long day in front of my computer). Sometimes questions are harder and more taxing, challenging us at our very core (should I quit my job or leave a toxic relationship). I remember reading once of the importance of setting my compass for the day by asking the question:  How do I want to show up in my life today?  I often forget to ask that question until something challenges me. Even in retrospect, I find that I can reset my compass for the remainder of my day with those simple words. I love the questions…but I find that the quality of my life depends not so much on the question but my willingness to hear what the question is really asking me.

I have learned that a question is just a group of words until I consider my willingness to honestly answer it. When I do, and I answer it truthfully and with integrity, my answer usually leads me to a willingness to live my life more fully and in a way that is more aligned with my heart.  Willingness should not (at least in my mind) be considered “wimpy” or invalidate a person. It takes courage to truly change, not shift with the wind. Willingness is a valuable key that should always lead back to more valid questions. The power of “being willing” has unlocked my personal limitations and freed me to experience adventure and opportunity. What I have discovered is that my ability to “be willing” frees me from fears that keep my life small. If I am willing to consider what you have to say, then I will be more connected to you as a person; if I am willing to risk failure, than I might find success; if I am willing to be patient, kind and loving then I will find deep connections with the people I love.

I think the greatest block to our ability to “be willing” is the fear that we might make a mistake, look foolish, or even risk closeness with another human being. Willingness exposes us and softens the sharp edges of our life. Of course, there may be good reason to hold our personal point of view and only you can know what those reasons are. But I have found when I set my personal opinion aside, even if for a moment, amazingly positive things came my way! If I can be willing to hear you, even if we disagree, then I will see you and give you a chance to see me…not for what I do but for who I am, at least in that present moment. Should that happen, maybe I or both of us will have a shift toward the happiness we have longed for. If my willingness finds solution and acceptance and even resolution, well, that’s a revolution I want to be part of!

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