Tuesday, December 28, 2010

The Voice of Discontent

We have all heard the voice of discontent, moving in to spoil our peace of mind and appreciation of any given moment. We let it whisper or sometimes scream in our thoughts, echoing a mistaken belief that we have been living with. I had the most wonderful gift in the form of discontent a few weeks ago. It's a silly story really, but one worth repeating because it led me to the notion that even that voice is only trying to point out something that I needed to be grateful for.

Our lawn is large and while I could be out there mowing it, manicuring it, weeding it, we are blessed to have a crew who comes in and regularly cares for it. After mowing, they use a blower. I HATE THE SOUND OF THE BLOWER!  One day I was feeling a little edgier than usual. The constant, grinding...loud...buzz was moving my peace of mind right out the door. Then a little voice said STOP!!! I began to count the blessings of our home. One, we have a home and one I love. Two, we have a yard where our children played and where our grandchildren now play. Three, I didn't have to mow the lawn! Once I opened the gate to a grateful heart, all the other reasons came flooding in. I had a family and children and grandchildren. I have a husband who loves me and whom I love! I had my health! Oh yes, did I mention I didn't have to mow the lawn?? It became apparent to me that my discontent was a whisper reminding me to stop and pay attention to what was right in front of me!

I have realized that many of the things that I feel discontent about is more about my interpretation than it is about what is happening. I have painted myself into plenty of corners, feeling there was no way out, until I realized that I was holding the paintbrush and could simply paint a door on the wall behind me and walk out of it! While my life has not been without challenges, and plenty of them, as I get older I realize that my discontent made many things far worse than they were. Like Scrooge looking back at Christmas Past, I wish I could have listened with a gentler ear to my discontent and what it was trying to tell me. But awareness is everything; so next time it pops its little head in to say hello I am simply going to stop and count my blessings!!!

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